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Getting Your Body Back into Balance After Stress: Practical Techniques and Self-Talk Strategies

Updated: 2 days ago

Stress is an inevitable part of life, whether it’s related to tight work deadlines, personal challenges, or the general pressures we face. While stress can be motivating in the short term, prolonged periods of stress can activate our body’s fight-or-flight response, leaving us feeling physically and emotionally drained. Fortunately, there are several practical techniques and self-talk strategies to help calm our nervous system and bring the body back into balance.

Be sure to read the article to the end where I discuss the psychological and scientific explanations of why these techniques are effective.

Be sure to read the article to the end where I discuss the psychological and scientific explanations of why these techniques are effective.

1. Deep Breathing Exercises

When you’re stressed, your breathing tends to become shallow and rapid, which fuels the body’s stress response. Slow, deep breathing helps activate the parasympathetic nervous system (the “rest and digest” mode), counteracting the fight-or-flight response.

How to do it:

Find a quiet space where you can sit or lie comfortably.
Breathe in slowly through your nose for a count of four, hold the breath for a count of four, then exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of six.
Repeat this process for a few minutes, focusing on the sensation of the breath entering and leaving your body.

Self-talk to accompany the practice:

• “I am safe, and I can handle this.”

• “With each breath, I am letting go of tension.”

• “I’m giving my body the time it needs to relax.”

2. Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)

Stress can cause muscle tension, which can lead to discomfort or even pain. Progressive Muscle Relaxation helps by guiding you through tensing and then releasing muscle groups, promoting relaxation.

How to do it:

Start at your feet and work your way up, focusing on each muscle group.
For each group (feet, calves, thighs, abdomen, chest, arms, face), tense the muscles for 5-10 seconds, then release for 20-30 seconds.
Pay attention to the difference between tension and relaxation, and notice how your body softens as you release.

Self-talk to accompany the practice:

• “I’m allowing my body to release the tension I’ve been holding onto.”

• “Each muscle group is becoming relaxed and calm.”

• “I’m giving myself permission to let go of stress.”

3. Mindfulness Meditation

Mindfulness meditation allows you to reconnect with the present moment, helping you break free from the cycle of anxious thoughts that often accompany stress. It cultivates awareness of your body, breath, and thoughts, creating space for relaxation.

How to do it:

Sit comfortably, either on a chair or cross-legged on the floor, with your spine straight.
Close your eyes and focus on your breath. When your mind wanders (which it inevitably will), gently guide your focus back to your breath.
Start with 5-10 minutes and gradually increase the time as you become more comfortable.

Self-talk to accompany the practice:

• “It’s okay to take a break and rest my mind.”

• “I can observe my thoughts without needing to react to them.”

• “I am present in this moment, free from worry.”

4. Physical Movement: Gentle Exercise or Stretching

Physical activity helps burn off the excess adrenaline and cortisol that build up during stressful periods. Gentle exercises like walking, yoga, or stretching can also reduce tension in the body.

How to do it:

Take a brisk 10-15 minute walk outdoors. Fresh air and a change of environment can do wonders for your mindset.
Alternatively, try a few gentle stretches, focusing on areas that feel tight, such as your neck, shoulders, and back.
If you enjoy yoga, a short, gentle flow focused on deep breathing and stretching can bring relief.

Self-talk to accompany the practice:

• “I’m moving my body to help it feel better.”

• “Each stretch is helping to release the stress I’ve been holding.”

• “I’m giving my body what it needs to feel strong and balanced again.”

5. Hydration and Nutrition

When we’re stressed, we often forget to care for our bodies’ basic needs, like hydration and nutrition. Stress can also affect your digestion and appetite, leading to poor food choices or dehydration. Drinking water and eating nourishing meals can help restore balance.

How to do it:

Drink a glass of water and consider herbal teas such as chamomile or peppermint, known for their calming properties.
Eat a balanced meal with lean protein, healthy fats, and complex carbohydrates to stabilize your blood sugar levels and support your body’s recovery.

Self-talk to accompany the practice:

• “I’m taking care of my body by hydrating and nourishing it.”

• “I’m choosing foods that fuel me and help me feel grounded.”

• “I deserve to feel my best, and I am giving my body the support it needs.”

6. Sleep and Rest

Often overlooked, proper rest is essential for recovery after a period of stress. Sleep allows your body to repair itself and reset your nervous system. If you’ve been running on adrenaline, your body will need a proper rest to fully recover.

How to do it:

Create a relaxing bedtime routine: dim the lights, avoid screens, and engage in calming activities like reading or listening to soothing music.
Try to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep each night. If you’re unable to get a full night’s sleep, consider taking short naps throughout the day.

Self-talk to accompany the practice:

• “Rest is important for my recovery and well-being.”

• “I’m allowing my body to fully relax and recharge.”

• “Sleep restores my energy and helps me handle challenges with clarity.”

7. Positive Self-Talk: Reframing Stressful Thoughts

Often, stress is magnified by the stories we tell ourselves. Reframing these thoughts can help us regain perspective and reduce the intensity of our stress response.

How to do it:

When you catch yourself in a negative thought pattern, stop and ask: “Is this thought helpful? Is it based on facts or assumptions?”
Replace negative or catastrophic thoughts with balanced, realistic ones. For example, if you’re feeling overwhelmed by a work deadline, try reframing: “This is challenging, but I’ve handled difficult situations before, and I will find a solution.”

Self-talk examples:

• “I’ve handled stress before, and I know how to manage it.”

• “This situation is temporary, and I have the tools to get through it.”

• “I’m proud of how I’m handling this, and I can take the necessary steps to feel better.”

The Psychology and Science behind these Techniques

Let’s look at the psychological and scientific underpinnings of the stress recovery techniques we discussed, starting with the more psychological strategies, like mindfulness, self-talk, and reframing. Understanding how these techniques work can enhance their effectiveness and provide a deeper connection to their benefits.

1. Mindfulness Meditation: The Psychology of Presence

Mindfulness is rooted in psychological principles, primarily the concept of present-moment awareness. When we’re stressed, our thoughts often become fixated on the past (regret) or the future (anxiety), which activates our fight-or-flight response. Mindfulness involves observing our thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations in the present without judgment.

Psychological Mechanism:

Reduction of Rumination: Mindfulness has been shown to reduce rumination, the repetitive cycle of negative thinking that exacerbates stress and anxiety. According to the rumination hypothesis of depression (Nolen-Hoeksema, 2000), continuous negative thought patterns contribute to prolonged stress and emotional dysregulation. Mindfulness disrupts this pattern by teaching individuals to detach from their thoughts and experience them without identifying with them.

Improved Emotional Regulation: Mindfulness activates the prefrontal cortex (PFC), the brain region responsible for executive functions like emotional regulation, decision-making, and impulse control. When we focus on the present, we enhance the PFC’s ability to dampen the activity of the amygdala, the brain’s “fear centre,” which is more reactive during times of stress. This helps to balance emotional responses, reducing stress.

Cognitive Reappraisal: Mindfulness can improve emotional regulation through cognitive reappraisal—the ability to view situations from a new perspective, which is also an effective strategy for reducing stress. For example, instead of seeing a deadline as overwhelming, mindfulness teaches you to acknowledge your feelings of stress without judgment, which can make them easier to manage.

2. Positive Self-Talk: The Power of Cognitive Behavioural Techniques

Self-talk refers to the internal dialogue we have with ourselves, and it plays a significant role in shaping how we perceive and react to stress. Negative self-talk, such as “I can’t handle this” or “I’m not good enough,” reinforces feelings of helplessness and anxiety. In contrast, positive self-talk helps to reframe stressors and provides emotional support, which reduces the intensity of the fight-or-flight response.

Psychological Mechanism:

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): Positive self-talk is rooted in CBT, which is based on the premise that our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours are interconnected. Negative thinking patterns (like catastrophising) create a distorted view of the situation, leading to emotional and physical stress. By challenging and replacing negative thoughts with more balanced, constructive ones, we change our emotional responses and reduce stress.

Self-Efficacy and Stress Management: According to Albert Bandura’s theory of self-efficacy, individuals who believe they can manage a challenging situation (i.e., through positive self-talk) are more likely to succeed and feel less stressed. Positive self-talk can reinforce the belief that one has control over their situation, which, in turn, lowers the physiological and psychological impact of stress.

Self-Compassion: Studies on self-compassion (Neff, 2003) show that treating oneself with kindness during stressful moments (as opposed to being overly critical) reduces emotional distress and improves overall well-being. Positive self-talk fosters self-compassion by encouraging a supportive inner voice that comforts rather than criticises.

3. Self-Compassionate Self-Talk: A Buffer Against Stress

When under stress, we can often become our own harshest critics. However, self-compassionate self-talk (as discussed above) provides a psychological buffer that helps us to maintain emotional balance during difficult times.

Psychological Mechanism:

Reduction in the Stress Response: Studies have shown that self-compassion reduces physiological markers of stress, such as cortisol levels (Kelly H. Werner et al., 2012). When we treat ourselves kindly during stressful periods, we activate the parasympathetic nervous system (the body’s relaxation response), which counters the fight-or-flight reaction.

Resilience Building: Self-compassion fosters resilience, which is the psychological ability to bounce back from adversity. By viewing stressful experiences with understanding and patience, we’re able to recover more quickly and maintain our sense of well-being.

Still Stressed?

Reframing Stressful Thoughts: Cognitive Flexibility and Stress Perception

Reframing is the act of changing how we interpret a stressful event. For instance, instead of viewing a challenging work project as a threat to your well-being, reframing would involve seeing it as an opportunity to demonstrate your skills. This shift in perspective helps reduce feelings of helplessness and increase feelings of control, which can significantly lower stress levels.

Psychological Mechanism:

Cognitive Flexibility: Reframing is closely linked to cognitive flexibility, the ability to adapt one’s thinking and behaviour in response to changing situations. Cognitive flexibility helps individuals see multiple perspectives, reducing the tendency to get stuck in rigid, distressing thought patterns. Reframing stressful events into manageable challenges can alleviate anxiety and help restore a sense of balance.

Stress as a Challenge vs. a Threat: Research by Jamieson et al. (2013) has shown that when people reframe stress as a challenge rather than a threat, they experience less physical stress response (such as lower cortisol levels) and perform better under pressure. This mindset shift helps the body maintain a more balanced physiological state, rather than being trapped in the heightened fight-or-flight state.

Appraisal Theory of Stress: According to the transactional model of stress (Lazarus & Folkman, 1984), stress arises when we appraise a situation as either a threat (something harmful or overwhelming) or a challenge (something we can handle). Reframing allows individuals to shift their appraisal from threat to challenge, reducing the intensity of the stress response.

Here are some examples of self-talk to support reframing stressful thoughts, with a focus on cognitive flexibility and the perception of stress as a challenge rather than a threat:

1. Seeing Opportunities in Challenges

Situation: A high-stakes presentation at work feels overwhelming.

Reframed Self-Talk: “This presentation is my chance to highlight my skills and make an impact. I’ve prepared well, and I can handle this. This is an opportunity to grow and showcase what I’m capable of.”

2. Shifting from Threat to Challenge

Situation: A big project deadline is looming, and it feels like too much.

Reframed Self-Talk: “Instead of seeing this as a threat, I’m going to treat it like a challenge. I can break it down into smaller steps, and with each step, I’m getting closer to the finish line. I’ve handled similar things before, and I can do it again.”

3. Reinterpreting Physical Stress Responses

Situation: You feel nervous and tense before an important meeting.

Reframed Self-Talk: “This energy I’m feeling is my body gearing up to help me focus. It’s a sign that I’m ready and alert. I can use this energy to perform well and stay sharp.”

4. Adapting Perspective on Unforeseen Challenges

Situation: A sudden change at work disrupts your plans and causes stress.

Reframed Self-Talk: “This is an opportunity to practice flexibility and adaptability. Although this change is unexpected, I have the resources to adjust. Every challenge like this builds my resilience and makes me more adaptable.”

5. Emphasising Growth over Perfection

Situation: You’re stressed about a task that feels out of your comfort zone.

Reframed Self-Talk: “Growth happens outside my comfort zone. I may not be perfect, but tackling this will give me new skills and confidence. This is a step towards becoming more capable and resilient.”

6. Focusing on What’s Within Control

Situation: Feeling anxious about uncertain future outcomes.

Reframed Self-Talk: “Instead of fixating on the unknown, I can focus on what I can control—my preparation, attitude, and effort. By taking positive actions, I’m building the best foundation for the outcome.”

7. Accepting Imperfection as Part of Progress

Situation: Worried about making mistakes under pressure.

Reframed Self-Talk: “Mistakes are part of learning and growth. This isn’t a threat to my success; it’s a chance to improve. I’ll take it one step at a time, and any missteps can be valuable lessons.”

To dive deeper into these reframing techniques and understand the mental roadblocks that can make stress feel overwhelming, check out my course “Psychological Barriers to Effective Communication.” In the course, we unpack common cognitive barriers, including rigid thought patterns and stress appraisals, and explore practical strategies to overcome them. By learning to reframe challenges and see stress from a new angle, you’ll gain tools to communicate more effectively and navigate stressful situations with greater ease.

Scientific Rationale Behind the Physical Techniques

Let’s now explore the scientific rationale behind physical techniques, such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation (PMR), and movement, in terms of how they help bring the body back into balance after a stress response. These techniques are all designed to directly counteract the physiological effects of stress and restore a state of equilibrium in the body and mind.

1. Deep Breathing: Calming the Nervous System

Deep breathing is a powerful tool for activating the body’s relaxation response. Stress triggers the sympathetic nervous system (SNS), responsible for the “fight-or-flight” response, which increases heart rate, blood pressure, and stress hormones like cortisol. Deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), which promotes relaxation and counteracts these stress responses.

Scientific Mechanism:

Activation of the Parasympathetic Nervous System: Deep, slow breathing (especially diaphragmatic or belly breathing) stimulates the vagus nerve, a key component of the parasympathetic nervous system. The vagus nerve sends signals to the brain that reduce heart rate and lower blood pressure, shifting the body into a state of rest and recovery. This process is known as vagal tone, and research has shown that deep breathing improves vagal tone, promoting a calmer and more balanced physiological state.

Reduction in Cortisol Levels: Deep breathing has been shown to lower cortisol levels, the hormone primarily responsible for stress. Studies have demonstrated that slow, controlled breathing can decrease cortisol levels in both short-term and chronic stress situations, helping to bring the body back into a baseline state of calm.

Heart Rate Variability (HRV): Heart rate variability refers to the variation in the time intervals between heartbeats, and it’s an important indicator of how well the body can adapt to stress. High HRV is associated with better emotional regulation, while low HRV is a marker of stress and poor autonomic nervous system balance. Deep breathing increases HRV, indicating that the body is able to recover from stress more efficiently.

2. Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR): Reducing Muscle Tension

Progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) is a relaxation technique where you systematically tense and then relax different muscle groups in the body. This process helps to reduce physical tension that can build up during stress, and it can also help to break the cycle of stress-induced physical symptoms, like headaches, muscle tightness, or stomach discomfort.

Scientific Mechanism:

Autonomic Nervous System Regulation: By consciously tensing and relaxing muscle groups, PMR activates the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) and reduces sympathetic nervous system (SNS) dominance. This process helps to reduce the hyperarousal state associated with stress, calming the body’s response. The alternating process of tension and relaxation promotes the body’s ability to control the stress response.

Reduction of Muscle Tension and Pain: Stress often leads to muscle tightness, particularly in the neck, shoulders, and jaw, which can result in physical discomfort. PMR helps to release this tension by encouraging the muscles to let go, providing both immediate relief and long-term muscle relaxation. Studies have shown that PMR can be an effective treatment for tension-related headaches, neck and back pain, and even chronic pain syndromes.

Mind-Body Connection: PMR encourages individuals to focus on the sensations in their body, which promotes body awareness. This awareness can break the cycle of stress-induced “somatic” symptoms (those physical symptoms of anxiety, like stomachaches, rapid breathing, or trembling). This process not only helps reduce physical discomfort but also encourages individuals to tune into their body’s signals, fostering mindfulness.

3. Movement and Exercise: Releasing Endorphins

Physical activity is one of the most well-researched ways to counteract the effects of stress. It promotes the release of endorphins, the body’s natural “feel-good” chemicals, which can improve mood and act as natural painkillers. Exercise also helps to regulate cortisol levels and improve overall well-being.

Scientific Mechanism:

Endorphin Release: When we engage in physical exercise, the brain releases endorphins—chemicals that act as natural painkillers and mood elevators. Endorphins help mitigate the impact of stress by reducing physical and emotional discomfort. Exercise, especially aerobic activities like running, swimming, or dancing, can elevate endorphin levels, resulting in a post-exercise “high” that can last for hours.

Regulation of Cortisol: Exercise has been shown to regulate cortisol levels. While intense physical activity can initially increase cortisol production (a normal response to exercise), regular, moderate exercise actually helps reduce baseline cortisol levels over time. This makes the body more resilient to stress, helping individuals recover from stressful situations more quickly.

Neuroplasticity and Stress Resilience: Regular exercise enhances neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to adapt and form new neural connections. Research has shown that physical activity increases the production of brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF), a protein that supports brain health and resilience to stress. Increased BDNF has been associated with improved emotional regulation and a reduced vulnerability to depression and anxiety.

Improved Sleep and Stress Recovery: Exercise improves sleep quality, and quality sleep is essential for stress recovery. Sleep deprivation has been linked to heightened stress responses, as well as increased emotional reactivity. Exercise helps regulate the circadian rhythm, leading to better sleep, which in turn supports the body’s natural recovery processes after stress.

4. Other Physical Techniques: Grounding and Relaxation

Techniques like grounding (e.g., walking barefoot on grass or touching objects around you) and the use of biofeedback devices (which monitor physiological responses like heart rate) can also help reduce stress.

Scientific Mechanism:

Grounding (Earthing): Grounding involves direct contact with the earth’s surface, and it’s believed to reduce inflammation and promote relaxation. Research suggests that grounding can lower cortisol levels, reduce stress, and improve sleep by rebalancing the body’s electrical energy. Although more research is needed, some studies show that grounding can improve mood and help with pain management.

Biofeedback: Biofeedback techniques provide individuals with real-time information about their physiological state, such as heart rate, breathing patterns, and skin temperature. This awareness allows individuals to regulate these responses and return to a calm state more quickly. Biofeedback has been shown to be an effective tool for managing anxiety, stress, and even chronic conditions like high blood pressure.